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Here is a great Turkey Recipe for those of you who just can’t tell when a  turkey is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out. Give this a try.

Turkey Recipe

• 8 – 15 lb. turkey
• 1 cup melted butter
• 1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good)
• 1 cup un-popped popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHER’S LOW FAT IS BEST)
• Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Brush turkey well with melted butter, salt, and pepper.

Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.

Place in baking pan making sure the neck end is toward the front of the oven, not the back.

After about 4 hours listen for the popping sounds.

When the turkey’s butt blows the oven door open and the bird flies across the room it’s done.

A magazine recently ran a “Dilbert Quotes” contest.. They were looking for people to submit quotes from their real-life Dilbert-type managers. These were voted the top ten quotes in corporate America:

“As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday, and employees will receive their cards in two weeks.”  (This was the winning quote from Fred Dales, Microsoft Corp. In Redmond WA )

“What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we might encounter.” (Lykes Lines Shipping)

“E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should be used only for company business.” (Accounting manager, Electric Boat Company)

“This project is so important we can’t let things that are more important interfere with it.”(Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)

“Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule .”  (Plant Manager, Delco Corporation)

“No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We’ve been working on it for months. Now go act busy for a few weeks and I’ll let you know when it’s time to tell them.”  (R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing/3M Corp
Quote from the Boss: “Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say.”   (Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)

My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday.
When I told my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss work on the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said, “That would be better for me.”  (Shipping executive, FTD Florists)

“We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees.” (Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)

The boss of a Madison Avenue advertising agency called a spontaneous staff meeting in the middle of a particularly stressful week. (This is one pretty sharp boss!) When everyone gathered, the boss, who understood the benefits of having fun, told the burnt out staff the purpose of the meeting was to have a quick contest. The theme: Viagra advertising slogans.

The only rule was they had to use past ad slogans, originally written for other products that captured the essence of Viagra. Slight variations were acceptable.

About 7 minutes later, they turned in their suggestions and created a Top 10 List. With all the laughter and camaraderie, the rest of the week went very well for everyone! The top 10 were:

10. Viagra, Whaazzzz up!

9. Viagra, The quicker pecker picker upper.

8. Viagra, like a rock !

7. Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.

6. Viagra , Be all that you can be.

5. Viagra, Reach out and touch someone.

4. Viagra, Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman.

3. Viagra, Home of the whopper!

2. Viagra, We bring good things to Life!

And the unanimous number one  slogan:

1. This is your peepee… This is your peepee on drugs.