Archive for the ‘Thanksgiving Jokes’ Category

20
Nov

Here is a great Turkey Recipe for those of you who just can’t tell when a  turkey is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out. Give this a try.

Turkey Recipe

  • 8 – 15 lb. turkey
  • 1 cup melted butter
  • 1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good)
  • 1 cup un-popped popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHER’S LOW FAT IS BEST)
  • Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Brush turkey well with melted butter, salt, and pepper.

Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.

Place in baking pan making sure the neck end is toward the front of the oven, not the back.

After about 4 hours listen for the popping sounds.

When the turkey’s butt blows the oven door open and the bird flies across the room it’s done.

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26
Nov

Slay.me Joke of the DayA man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.”

“Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams.

“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the father says.

“We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you  call your sister in Chicago and tell her.”

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.  “Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of
this.”

She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, “You are NOT getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back,  and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU  HEAR ME?” And hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay,” he  says, “They’re coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way.”

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25
Nov

Slay.me Joke of the DayHappy Thanksgiving!  Here are some good Thanksgiving Jokes to share with your family and friends:

1.  Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? – The outside

2.  Why did they let the turkey join the band? – Because he had the drumsticks

3.  Why did the police arrest the turkey?  They suspected it of fowl play

4.  What did the turkey say before it was roasted? Boy! I’m stuffed!

5.  What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian? – He had an arrow escape

And finally…

Twas the night of Thanksgiving, But I just couldn’t sleep.
I tried counting backwards, I tried counting sheep
The leftovers beckoned — The dark meat and white,
But I fought the temptation with all of my might.

Tossing and turning with anticipation
The thought of a snack became infatuation.
So I raced to the kitchen, Flung open the door,
And gazed at the fridge full of goodies galore.
I gobbled up turkey and buttered potatoes,
Pickles and carrots, beans and tomatoes.

I felt myself swelling so plump and so round,
Till all of a sudden, I rose off the ground !!

I crashed through the ceiling. Floating into the sky….
With a mouthful of pudding and a handful of pie,
But I managed to yell as I soared past the trees …

HAPPY EATING TO ALL !!

PASS THE CRANBERRIES PLEASE !!

thanksgiving funny

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