23
Mar

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to the recent virus threat and have therefore raised their threat level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, that level may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.”

The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the Blitz of 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.

The virus has been recategorized from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued “A Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “Pissed Off” to “Let’s Get the Bastard.” They don’t have any other threat levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British Army for the last 300 years.

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