Slay.me

A Husband went Christmas Shopping at a busy shopping mall just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, so she called him on his cell.

The wife said ” Where are you, you know we have lots to do.”

He said “You remember the jewelers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?”

Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all choked up…

“Yes, I do remember that shop.” she replied.

“Well I am in the golf shop next door to that.”

Three  men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at  the pearly gates.

“In honor of this holy season”  Saint Peter said,  “You must each possess something  that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.”

The  first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a  lighter. He flicked it on. “It represents a candle”, he  said.

“You may pass through the pearly  gates” Saint Peter said.

The  second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of  keys.  He shook them and said, “They’re bells.”

Saint Peter said “You may pass through the pearly gates”.

The third man started searching  desperately through his pockets and finally pulled  out a pair of women’s panties.

St. Peter looked at  the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, “And just what do those symbolize?”

The man  replied, “These are Carol’s.”

why does santa have 3 gardens?

so he can ho ho ho

By: Kelly