Archive for the ‘Senior Citizen Jokes’ Category

18
Apr

Senior Texting Codes

Now Seniors have their own texting codes:

* ATD – At the Doctor’s
* BFF – Best Friends Funeral
* BTW – Bring the Wheelchair
* BYOT – Bring Your Own Teeth
* CBM – Covered by Medicare
* CUATSC – See You at the Senior Center
* DWI – Driving While Incontinent
* FWIW – Forgot Where I Was
* GGPBL – Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low
* GHA – Got Heartburn Again
* HGBM – Had Good Bowel Movement
* LMDO – Laughing My Dentures Out
* LOL – Living on Lipitor
* OMSG – Oh My! Sorry, Gas
* TOT – Texting on Toilet
* WAITT – Who Am I Talking To?
Hope these help. GGLKI

(Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!)

10
Apr

Go Grampa Baller

Watch this Grampa show them how to play Futbol / Soccer

 

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01
Apr

Joke of the DayAn 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his prostrate examination.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, ‘Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.’

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor’s office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, ‘Well, doc, it’s like this — first I tried with my right hand, but nothing.

Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.

‘Then I asked my wife for help.  She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing.

She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.

‘We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin’ it between her knees, but still nothing.’

The doctor was shocked!

‘You asked your neighbor?’

The old man replied, ‘Yep, none of us could get the jar open.’

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