Posts Tagged ‘tiger woods’
15
Jul

Little Johnny, Christmas Break, and Tiger Woods Joke

Slay.me Joke of the DayIt is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have  turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do.   All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

Teacher: “Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today.”

Little Johnny says to himself  “Good, I want to get outta here. I’m smart and will answer the question.”

Teacher:  “Who said ‘Four Score and Seven Years Ago’?”

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, “Abraham Lincoln.”

Teacher: “That’s right Susie, you can go home.”

Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

Teacher: “Who said ‘I Have a Dream’?”

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, “Martin Luther King.”

Teacher: “That’s right Mary, you can go.”

Johnny is even madder than before.

Teacher: “Who said ‘Ask not, what your country can do for you’?”

Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, “John F. Kennedy.”

Teacher: “That’s right Nancy, you may also leave.”

Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, “I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!”

The teacher turns around: “NOW WHO SAID THAT?”

Johnny: “TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?”

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06
Jun

Tiger Woods’ Apology

Here is what Tiger Woods wanted to say:

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08
Jan

5 Rules for a Happy Life

Slay.me Joke of the DayHere are the 5 most important rules for men to follow for a happy life:

  1. It’s important to have a woman who helps at home, cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.
  2. It’s important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
  3. It’s important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn’t lie to you.
  4. It’s important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
  5. It’s very, very important that these four women do not know each other.

Sincerely,

Tiger Woods

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