Archive for the ‘Funny Poems’ Category

02
Jul

The National Poetry Contest had come down to two semi-finalists:
a) a Yale graduate
b) a Redneck

Joke of the DayThey were given a single word, then allowed two minutes to come up with a poem containing that word. The word they were given was “TIMBUKTU”.
The Yale graduate stepped up the microphone and said:

“SLOWLY ACROSS THE DESERT SAND TREKKED A LONELY CARAVAN.
MEN ON CAMELS – TWO BY TWO
DESTINATION – TIMBUKTU”.

The crowd went crazy! No way could the Redneck top that, they thought.

The Redneck calmly made his way to the microphone, and recited:

“ME AND TIM A HUNTIN’ WENT,
MET THREE WHORES IN A POP-UP TENT.
DEY WAS THREE, AND WE WAS TWO
SO I BUCKED ONE, AND TIMBUKTU

The Redneck won hands down

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16
Feb

Slay.me Joke of the DaySusie Lee done fell in love;

She planned to marry Joe.

She was so happy ’bout it all

She told her Pappy so.

Pappy told her, “Susie gal,

You’ll have to find another.

I’d just as soon yo’ Ma don’t know,

But Joe is yo’ half brother”

So Susie put aside her Joe

And planned to marry Will.

But after telling Pappy this,

He said, “There’s trouble still…

You can’t marry Will, my gal,

And please don’t tell your Mother,

But Will and Joe and several mo’

I know is yo’ half brother”

But Mama knew and said, “My child,

Just do what makes you happy.

Marry Will or marry Joe

You ain’t no kin to Pappy.

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31
Jan

Slay.me Joke of the DayThe computer swallowed Grandma
Yes, honestly it’s true
She pressed control and enter
And disappeared from view
It devoured her completely
The thought just makes me squirm
She must of caught a virus
Or been eaten by a worm
I’ve searched through the recycle bin
And files of every kind
I’ve even used the internet
But nothing did I find
In desperation I asked Jeeves
My searches to refine
The reply from him was negative
Not a thing was found online
So if inside your inbox
My Grandma you should see
Please copy, scan and paste her
And send her back to me

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