Archive for the ‘Sick Perverted Jokes’ Category

25
Jan

This is the new Miss Kentucky.  The picture that will stay with her for the rest of her life:

 

Make-up and hair style ………………. $500

 

New dress for the show ………………$700

 

Giant stuffed bear ……………………… $300

Not knowing how to hold the bear with a microphone in her hand …..Priceless!!!

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12
Sep

A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train.

Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.

At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying,……….

‘Ma’am, I’m sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I’m awfully cold.’

‘I have a better idea,’ she replied ‘Just for tonight,…… let’s pretend that we’re married.’

‘Wow!…………………. That’s a great idea!’, he exclaimed.

‘Good,’ she replied. ………….’Get your own f***ing blanket.’

After a moment of silence, ………………….he farted.

The End

16
Apr

Slay.me Joke of the DayDonald  Duck and Daisy Duck were spending the night together in  a hotel room and Donald wanted to have sex with  Daisy.

The  first thing Daisy asked was, “Do you have a  condom?”

Donald  frowned and said, “No.”

Daisy told Donald that if  he didn’t get a condom,  they  could not have sex.

“Maybe they sell them at  the front desk,” she  suggested.

So  Donald went down to the lobby  and asked  the hotel clerk if they had  condoms.

“Yes,  we do,” the clerk said and  pulled  a box out from under the counter and  gave  it to Donald.

The  clerk asked, “Would you like me to put them  on  your bill?”

“Thit  No!”  Donald quacked, “I’ll  thuffocate!”

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