Archive for the ‘Maine Jokes’ Category

01
Jul

Slay.me Joke of the DaySome engineers from the U.S.G.S. surveyed some property and found that in a area, the New Hampshire and Maine border must be changed. They stopped to inform a farmer that he was no longer in Maine, but in New Hampshire.

After a long pause, he grunted and said, “That’s good. I couldn’t take another one of these Maine winters.”

,

30
Jun

Slay.me Joke of the DayStumpy Grinder and his wife Martha were from Portland, Maine. Every year they went to the Portland Fair, and every year Stumpy said ” Ya know Mahtha, I’d like ta get a ride in that theah aihplane.”

and every year Martha would say “I know Stumpy, but that ihplane ride costs ten dollahs…. and ten dollahs is ten dollahs.”

So Stumpy says ” By Jeebers Mahtha, I’m 71 yeahs old, if I don’t go this time I may nevah go.”

Martha replies ” Stumpy, that there aihplane ride is ten dollahs…and ten dollahs is ten dollahs.”

So the pilot overhears them and says ” Folks, I’ll make you a deal, I’ll take you both up for a ride, if you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say ONE word, I won’t charge you, but just one word and it’s ten dollars.”

They agree and up they go…. the pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard, he does it one more time, still nothing… so he lands.

He turns to Stumpy as they come to a stop and says ” By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to holler out, but you didn’t.”

And Stumpy replies ” Well, I was gonna say something when Mahtha fell out…but ten dollahs is ten dollahs!

,