30
Mar
We have no idea what he sees in her!
jokes's page
30
Mar
A new Army Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the Afghan Dessert. During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent. He asked the Sergeant why the camel was kept there.
The nervous sergeant said, ‘Sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the post and no women. Sometimes the men have urges. That’s why we have Molly the Camel.
The Captain said, ‘I can’t say that I condone this, but I can understand about the ‘urges’, so the camel can stay.’
About a month later, the Captain starts having his own ‘urges’ Crazed with passion, he asked the Sergeant to bring the camel to his tent. Putting a ladder behind the camel, the Captain stands on the ladder, pulls his pants down and makes passionate love to the camel. When he’s done, he asked the Sergeant, ‘Is that how the men do it?’
‘No sir. They usually just ride the camel into town. That’s where the girls are.”
21
Mar
The Reverend John Fluff was the pastor in a small town in Ireland. One day he was walking down the high street when he noticed a young lady of his congregation sitting in a pub drinking beer. The Reverend wasn’t happy!
He walked through the open door of the pub and sat down next to the woman.
“Miss Fitzgerald,” he said sternly – “This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don’t you let me take you home?”
“Sure!” she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.
When Miss Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth.. The Reverend realized that she’d had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor. After a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top of Miss Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist.
The pub barkeep looked over and said, “Oy mate, we won’t have any of that carrying on in this pub.”
The Reverend looked up at the landlord and said, “But you don’t understand. I’m Pastor Fluff.”
The barkeep said, “Ah well, if you’re that far in, ye might as well finish.”