Posts Tagged ‘drunk’
21
Mar

Slay.me Joke of the DayThe Reverend John Fluff was the pastor in a small town in Ireland. One day he was walking down the high street when he noticed a young lady of his congregation sitting in a pub drinking beer. The Reverend wasn’t happy!

He walked through the open door of the pub and sat down next to the woman.

“Miss Fitzgerald,” he said sternly – “This is no place for a member of my congregation. Why don’t you let me take you home?”

“Sure!” she said with a slur, obviously very drunk.

When Miss Fitzgerald stood up from the bar, she began to weave back and forth.. The Reverend realized that she’d had far too much to drink and grabbed her arms to steady her. When he did, they both lost their balance and tumbled to the floor. After a few moments, the Reverend wound up on top of Miss Fitzgerald, her skirt hiked up to her waist.

The pub barkeep looked over and said, “Oy mate, we won’t have any of that carrying on in this pub.”

The Reverend looked up at the landlord and said, “But you don’t understand. I’m Pastor Fluff.”

The barkeep said, “Ah well, if you’re that far in, ye might as well finish.”

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28
Oct

Slay.me Joke of the DayMildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church’s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people’s business..

Several members did not approve of her extra curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused Frank, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one after noon.

She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that every one seeing it there **WOULD KNOW WHAT HE WAS DOING !**

Frank, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away.  He didn’t explain, defend, or deny.

He said nothing..

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house, walked home…and left it there all night.

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