Slay.me

A man walked into a cowboy bar and ordered a beer just as President Clinton appeared on the television. After a few sips, he looked up at the television and mumbled, “Now, there’s the biggest horse’s ass I’ve ever seen.” A customer at the end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and decked him.

A few minutes later, as the man was finishing his beer, Hillary Clinton appeared on the television. “She’s a horse’s ass too,” the man. This time, a customer at the other end of the bar quickly stood up, walked over to him, and knocked him off his stool. “Damn it!” the man said, climbing back up to the bar. “This must be Clinton country!”

“Nope,” the bartender replied. “Horse country!”

It so happens that the Pope and Bill Clinton died at the same time. There was a mix-up, and the Pope was sent to Hell and Clinton went to Heaven.

Of course, Satan immediately realized the error. He was quite displeased, so he set about to rectify the situation at once.

Nevertheless, relations between Heaven and Hell being what they are, it took a full day for the trade to be arranged.

When the Pope heard he was going to Heaven after all, he was much relieved, but being the caring soul he was, he was worried that Bill would be upset at the change. So when they met halfway, the Pope said,

“Mr. Clinton, I know you must be very disappointed, but you know I did live eighty years of a clean life bound to God, so that I could claim my Reward and kneel at the feet of the Virgin.”

And Bill, grinning, replies, “Well, Your Holiness, I’m afraid you’re a little too late for that!”