Slay.me

The computer swallowed Grandma
Yes, honestly it’s true
She pressed control and enter
And disappeared from view
It devoured her completely
The thought just makes me squirm
She must of caught a virus
Or been eaten by a worm
I’ve searched through the recycle bin
And files of every kind
I’ve even used the internet
But nothing did I find
In desperation I asked Jeeves
My searches to refine
The reply from him was negative
Not a thing was found online
So if inside your inbox
My Grandma you should see
Please copy, scan and paste her
And send her back to me

Question:  Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Response:  Yes I am, I married the wrong woman.

An elderly man  hears a knock on the door one evening and opens it to see an attractive girl wearing not many clothes who says:

“Hullo! It’s your birthday, and I’m the Birthday Girl, and all your friends have arranged for me to call on you and offer Super Sex.”

 So the old man thinks and says,

“All things considered, I’ll take the soup