Slay.me

Bob, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm . He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.

The 10 pm news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Bob and said, “Do you think he’ll jump?”

Bob said, “You know, I bet he’ll jump.”

The blonde replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”

Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, “You’re on!”

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob, saying, “Fair’s fair. Here’s your money.”

Bob replied, “I can’t take your money. I saw this earlier on the 5 pm news, and so I knew he would jump.”

The blonde replied, “I did too, but I didn’t think he’d do it again.”

Bob took the money…

A business man  got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, ‘T-G-I-F!’

He smiled at her and replied, ‘S-H-I-T.’
She looked puzzled and repeated, ‘T-G-I-F.’ more slowly.

He again answered, ‘S-H-I-T.’

The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, ‘T -G – I – F.’

The man smiled back to her and once again said ‘S-H-I-T.’

The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain. ‘T-G-I-F’ means ‘Thank Goodness It’s Friday.’ Get it,  duuhhh?’

The man answered,  ”S-H-I-T’ means ‘Sorry, Honey, it’s Thursday’