Posts Tagged ‘Nurse’

The Nurse’s Revenge

NurseA policeman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed Appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs in his groin area. Worried that it might be a second surgery that the doctors hadn’t told him about it, he finally got enough courage to pull his hospital gown up enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable.

It didn’t take long to discover the cause for his discomfort. Taped firmly across his pubic hair and private parts were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that doesn’t come off easily – – – if at all.

Written on the tape in large black letters was the sentence, “Get well soon from the nurse in the 2013 Ford Explorer you pulled over last week.”

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Obama’s Vasectomy Joke of the DayA man goes into the hospital for a vasectomy. Before the procedure the nurse comes in and takes his vitals, then tells him to take all of his clothes off.  When he is fully undressed she instructs him to lie down on the table.   The man obeys.  The nurse then takes all of her clothes off and climbs on top and has her way with him.

Upon the completion of the act the man catches his breath and asks what that was all about.

The nurse informs the patient that studies have shown that before a vasectomy if the man has an ejaculation, he will be more relaxed and that the vasectomy is easier for the surgeon to locate and sever.

The nurse then wheels the patient to the operating room.  While they are going down the hall the patient sees six men in a room masturbating.   Curious, the man asks “What are they doing in there”?

The nurse responds, “They are getting vasectomies too, but you have Blue Cross and they have Obama Care.

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