Slay.me

A man goes to his doctor for his physical and gets sent to the urologist for his yearly prostate check. When he gets there, he discovers the urologist is a very pretty female doctor.

The female doctor says, “I’m going to check your prostate today, but this new procedure is a little different from what you are probably used to. I want you to lie on your right side, bend your knees,
then while I check your prostate, take a deep breath and say, ’99’.”

The guy obeys and says,”99.”

The doctor says, “Great. Now turn over on your left side and again, while I repeat the check, take a deep breath and say, ’99’.”

Again, the guy says, ’99’.”

The doctor said, “Very good. Now then, I want you to lie on your back with your knees raised slightly. I’m going to check your prostate with this hand, and with the other hand I’m going to hold on to
your penis to keep it out of the way. Now take a deep breath and say, ’99’.”

The guy begins, “One .. Two … Three.”

Overheard in the Engineering department here at Cal Poly:

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.

One said, “it was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.”

Another said, “no, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections.”

The last said, “actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?”

A couple had been married  10 years. One afternoon, they were working in the garden together. As the wife was bending over pulling weeds, the husband said, ”Hey honey, you’re getting fat. Your butt is huge. I’ll bet it’s as wide as the gas grill.”

Feeling the need to prove his point, he got out a yard stick and measured the grill, then his wife’s butt. ”Yep,” he said,” just what I thought, just about the same size.”

The wife became incensed and left him gardening alone. She went inside the house and didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day.

When they retired to bed that evening, the husband cuddled up to his wife and said, ”How about it, honey? How about a little lovemaking?”

The wife turned her back to him, giving him the cold shoulder. ”What’s the matter?” he asked.

She replied, ”You don’t think I’m going to fire up this big ass grill for one little weenie, do you?’