Slay.me

A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would  now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband
was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect  to bring this to his wife’s attention. So, when the computer asked him to  enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed:

P…E…N…I…S

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:

**** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH***

The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink.

He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife.

He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.

He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them . As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.

Obviously they were thinking, ‘ That poor old couple – all they can afford is one meal for the two of them. ‘

As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the  table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine – they were  used to sharing everything

People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn’t eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.

Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them.
This time the old woman said ‘ No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything. ‘

Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked ‘ What is it you are waiting for?

She answered —

‘ THE TEETH. ‘

Dear Employees:

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our President and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way. To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase by about 10%. But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off sixty of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me since I believe we are family here and I didn’t know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lots and found sixty ‘Obama’ bumper stickers on our employees’ cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can’t think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for change……I gave it to them.

I will see the rest of you at the annual company picnic.

THE BOSS