Slay.me

During a recent company password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:

MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofy

When asked why such a big password, she said that it had to be at least 8 characters long.

I was in the pub yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to fart. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my farts with the beat.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my pint and noticed that everybody was staring at me.

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod.

There was an old couple sitting at a table. The old man said to the old lady, “I remember 50 years ago we were sitting at this very table.”

The old woman said, “Yes, and we were probably naked as jay birds.”

The old man said, “Well, what do you say..wanna get naked?” So they both stripped.

The old woman said, “You know hunny, my breasts are just as hot for you as they were 50 years ago.” a

The old man replied, “I can imagine, one is in your oatmeal and the other is in your coffee.”