Slay.me

A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.

When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake.  He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons.  So he knocked on the door to clarify the point.

The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, “I found your note asking me to leave 25 gallons of milk. Did you mean 2.5 gallons?”

The blonde said, “No, I want 25 gallons.  I’m going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again.”

The milkman asked, “Do you want it pasteurized?”

The blonde said, “No, just up to my tits. I can splash it on my eyes.”

A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks,

‘Can you tell me how long it’ll take to fly from   San Francisco  to   New York City  ?’

The agent replies, ‘Just a minute.’

‘Thank you,’ the blonde says, and hangs up.

A Blonde drops off a blouse at the cleaners and heads for the door.

The Asian lady behind the counter thanks her, and says

“Come Again”..

The Blonde says

“No, it’s toothpaste this time you nosey bitch!!!!”