Posts Tagged ‘neighbor’
20
Jul

Slay.me Joke of the DayA young man moved out from home and into a new apartment, all of his own, he went proudly down to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox.

While there, an stunning young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes, wearing only a robe.

The boy smiled at the young woman and she started up a conversation with Him.

As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had nothing else on. The poor kid broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact.

After a few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said, ‘Let’s go to my apartment, I hear someone coming.’

He followed her into her apartment; she closed the door and leaned against it, allowing her robe to fall off completely.

Now nude, she purred at him, ‘What would you say is my best feature?’

Flustered and embarrassed, he finally squeaked, ‘It’s got to be your ears.’

Astounded, and a little hurt she asked, ‘My ears?!?!?” Look at these breasts; they are a full 38 inches and 100% natural. I work out every day and my ass is firm and solid. I have a 28 inch waist. Look at my skin – not a blemish anywhere.

How can you think that the best part of my body is my ears?’

Clearing his throat, he stammered… ‘Outside, when you said you heard someone coming… That was me.’

, , , , , , , ,

07
Nov

Slay.me Joke of the DayTwo couples were playing cards.  John accidentally dropped some cards on the floor.  When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Bill’s wife wasn’t wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, John hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced.

Later, John went to the kitchen to get some refreshments.  Bill’s wife followed him and asked, “Did you see anything that you liked under there?”

John admitted that, well, yes, he did.

She said, “You can have it, but it will cost you $100.”

After a minute or two, John indicates that he is interested. She tells him that since Bill works Friday afternoons and John doesn’t, John should come to her house around 2:00 pm on Friday.

Friday came and John went to her house at 2:00 pm.  After paying her $100 they went to the bedroom, had sex and then John left.  Bill came home about 6:00 pm.  He asked his wife, “Did John come by this afternoon?”

Reluctantly, she replied, “Yes, he did stop by for a few minutes.”

Next Bill asked, “Did John give you $100?”

She thinks, “Oh hell, he knows!” Finally she says, “Well, yes… he did give me $100.”

“Good,” Bill says.  “John came by the office this morning and borrowed $100 from me.  He said that he would stop by our house on his way home and pay me back.”

, , , , , , ,