Posts Tagged ‘sick joke’

The 3 Survivors Joke of the DayA cruise on the Pacific goes all wrong, the ship sinks, and there are only 3 Survivors; George, Dave and Susie.

They manage to swim to a small island and they live there for a couple of years doing what’s natural for men and women to do..

After several years of casual sex, all the time, Susie felt absolutely horrible about what she was doing.

She felt having sex with both George and Dave  was so immoral and bad that she killed herself.

It was tragic, but George and  Dave managed to get through it. After a while,George and Dave ‘s resistance to nature’s urgings waned, and the inevitable happened.

Well, a couple more years went by and George and  Dave began to feel absolutely horrible about what they were doing.

So, they buried Susie.

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Sexual Harassment at the Coffee Machine Joke of the DayEvery day, a male co-worker walks up very close to a lady At the coffee machine, inhales a big breath of air, and tells Her that her hair smells nice.

After a week of this, she can’t stand it anymore, takes her Complaint to a Supervisor in the personnel department and asks To file a sexual harassment grievance against him. The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled, and asks:

“What’s threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?”

The woman replies, “It’s Frank. The midget.”

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The Warm Amish Girl Joke of the DayAn Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, “My hands are freezing cold.”

The mother replied, “Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up.” The daughter did, and her hands warmed up.

The next day the daughter was riding with her boy friend who said, “My hands are freezing cold.

“The girl replied, “Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up.” He did, and warmed his hands.

The following day the boyfriend was again in the buggy with the daughter. He said, “My nose is cold.”

The girl replied “Put it between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm it up.” He did, and warmed his nose.

The next day the boyfriend was again driving with the daughter, and he said, “My penis is frozen solid.”

The following day the daughter was driving in the buggy with her mother again, and she says to her mother, “Have you ever heard of a penis?”

Slightly concerned the mother said, “Why, yes. Why do you ask?”

The daughter replies, “They make one hell of a mess when they defrost, don’t they!”

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