Slay.me

Grandma and Grandpa were visiting Their kids overnight.

When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in His son’s medicine cabinet,  he asked About using one of the pills. The son said,  ” I don’t think you should Take one Dad;  they’re very strong And very expensive. ”

” How much ?”   asked Grandpa.

“$10.00 a pill, “Answered the son.

” I don’t care, ”   said Grandpa,  “I’d still like to Try one, and before we leave in the Morning, I’ll put the money Under the pillow. ”

Later the next morning,  the son found $110 under the pillow.

He called  Grandpa and said,  ” I told  You each pill was $10, not  $110. !”

“I know, ”   said Grandpa. ” The Hundred is from Grandma!  “

A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.

Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all.

After a long life together, the husband was the first to die.

True to his word, he made the first contact:

” Marion … Marion ”

“Is that you, Bob?”

“Yes, I’ve come back like we agreed.”

“That’s wonderful! What’s it like?”

“Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it’s off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the  warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch (you’d be proud – lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it’s back to golf course again.  Then it’s more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again”

“Oh, Bob are you in Heaven?”

“No………..I’m a rabbit in Arizona!”

Arthur is 95 years old. He’s played golf every day since his retirement 30 years ago.

One day he arrives home looking downcast. “That’s it,” he tells his wife.

I’m giving up golf.. My eyesight has gotten so bad…once I’ve hit the ball, I can’t see where it went.”

His wife sympathizes, and as they sit down, she says, “Why don’t you take my brother with you, and give it one more try.”

“That’s no good,” sighs Arthur. “Your brother is a hundred and three. He can’t help.”

“He may be a hundred and three”, says the wife, “but his eyesight is perfect.”

So the next day, Arthur heads off to the golf course with his brother-in-law. He tees up, takes a mighty swing, and squints down the airway. He turns to the brother-in-law. “Did you see the ball?”

“Of course I did!” says the brother-in-law. “I have perfect eyesight.”

“Where did it go?” asks Arthur.

“I can’t remember!”